leenlang\\\'s purpledoilies

A first-grade teacher, Ms Neelam was having trouble
with one of her
students the teacher asked,"Boy, what is your
problem?"


Boy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My
sister is in the
third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I
should be in the
third-grade too!"

Ms. Neelam had enough. She took Boy to the principal's
office.

While Boy waited in the outer office, the teacher
explained to the
principal what the situation was. The principal told
Ms Neelam he would
give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of
his questions he
was to go back to the first-grade and behave. She
agreed.

Boy was brought in and the conditions were explained
to him and he
agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Boy: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Boy: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal
thought a third-grade
should know. The principal looks at Ms. Neelam and
tells her, "I think
Boy can go to the third-grade. "


Ms. Neelam says to the principal, "I have some of my
own questions.

Can I ask him ?" The principal and Boy both agree.

1. Ms. Neelam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I
have only two of?

Boy, after a moment "Legs."

2. Ms. Neelam: "What is in your pants that you have but I
do not have?"

Boy: "Pockets."

3. Ms. Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is
hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Boy: Coconut

4. Ms. Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out
soft and sticky?
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he
could stop the
answer, Boy was taking charge.

Boy: Bubblegum

5. Ms. Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman
does sitting down
and a dog does on three legs? The principal's eyes
open really wide and
before he could stop the answer...

Boy: Shake hands

Ms. Neelam: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of
questions, okay?

Boy: Yep.

6. Ms. Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me
down to get me
up. I get wet before you do.

Boy: Tent

7. Ms. Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me
when you're bored.
The best man always has me first. The Principal was
looking restless, a
bit tense and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.

Boy: Wedding Ring

8. Ms. Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I
drip. When you
blow me, you feel good.


Boy: Nose

9. Ms. Neelam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I
come with a quiver.

Boy: Arrow

10. Ms. Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' that means lot
of heat and excitement?

Boy: Firetruck

11. Ms. Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' & if u dont get
it u have to use ur hand.

Boy: Fork

12. Ms. Neelam: What is it that all men have one of it's
longer on some men
than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man
gives it to his wife
after they're married?

Boy: SURNAME

13. Ms. Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has
muscles, has lots
of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making
love ?

Boy: HEART.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to
the teacher, "Send
this Boy to the University, I got the last ten
questions wrong myself!"

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It's not difficult to MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY.

A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynaecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes



HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

hehe hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ako or maiinis d2 sa forwarded email na 'to eh.. pero hmmm ganun talaga medyo hard to please ang mga gals eh... we need to feel loved and cared for, and we need to feel special. Not that the MAN has to complete us, but if we feel that the man we love doesn't give as much of those on the list, we feel sad... specially number 54! haha WAR na ito kapag nakalimutan yun!

yung #46, accepted na ang fact na guys and gals don't match at shopping, we girls tend to be mabusisi and because there are so many styles and designs available that it's hard to decide. Kaya guys complain a lot that we spend to much time shopping or ay yje very least scouting for something we really like. Guys only have POLO/POLO-SHIRT/T-SHIRT + SLACKS/JEANS/SHORTS.... sa girls mapupuno ang page na ito sa iba't ibang tawag sa damit. So for me OK lang if he doesn't like shopping.

the #7 is a big plus if the guy could cook, or at least cook simple meal to please you. I think it would always be nice to stay in bed late one weekend, and the man of the house enters the bedroom with a tray of hot fried rice and ulam and fresh juice! wow! that'll be a very special breakfast in bed! But considering #1 of HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY, i'm sure breakfast in bed is also a comvenient way of easily asking for the payback! hahaha

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i first saw the link from esi pero na-inspire akong mag-try when i saw missyosigirl's and drei's result. okay so eto yung few of my results.





i don't know kung anong resemblance ko kay Zang Ziyi eh.. hindi ko maintindihan pano ko na-match sa kanya...





etong kay Kim Tae Hee, nag-try ako ng ibang pic of a different angle at nandun pa rin sya sa match result.. hmmm....





kristin kreuk?! hmmmm... pede! hehehe

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1. fail to get-up at the sound of the alarm.
i set my alarm at 5am so that i can still do my laundry and get in the office by 7am. as expected of me, i really can't get out of the bed, the alarm has been snoozed a couple of times before i actually turned of the alrarm at 6am, though i got-off(finally!) at 6:30. I was able to do my laundry and prepare for work, and left before 7:30.

2. meet an exibitionist at 7:45am
at the Gate of the Bldg compound, a cool SUV was making a maneuver, tapos the driver stepped out of the car tapos he went at the back of the SUV. Nung katapat na ko ng SUV, nagtanong sya ng "miss, san papuntang Katipunan?" habang ibinaba ng bahagya ang shorts nya to show his thinggy... buti nde ko nlng sya tiningnan. diretso lang ang tingin ko sayng "dun" while pointing to my left. pretending na nde ko napansin ang ginawa nya.
sabi ng mga tao d2 sa office, i could have done two things, (1) stare at his thing and say, "yan na ba yun, ang liit naman!", and/or (2)while he was leaving, i could have thown a stone at his neat SUV...
hehe sayang wala akong nagawa sa 2 na yun, but i'm not sorry, thankful na ko na hanggang dun na lang ang nangyari. hay naku, broad daylight yan ha.. sa gate ng grounds ng office namin! wala na talagang pinipiling lugar ang mga nagti-trip!
mukha namang disente yung guy, late 20s sya, i think. He was wearing white and maroon striped polo-shirt and tapos garterized shorts na knee-length. he was driving a nice SUV, pero nde ko alam kung anong model/brand.. basta alam ko XRP-616 ang plate number nya.

3. catch a cold
runny nose is never a good day.

4. get wet on the rain
i met with my sister at philcoa, pero papunta pa lang ako mega traffic na ang inabot ko, good thing nakisabay ako kay ryan-san, it was comfortable pa rin. nung pabalik na kami ng sis ko to my boarding house, ang haba ng pila ng tricycle(result ng traffic, hindi makabalik agad ang mga tricycle), nung nakasakay na kami, bumuhos na naman ang malakas na ulan... malakas na ulan + traffic + tricycle ride is not a good idea. nakabukas na ang umbrella para hindi pumasok ang tubig, pero umaampyas pa rin at tumutulo sa upuan ko, ayun basa ang pants ko. tapos pagbaba namin, baha ng overflowing kanal ang nilusungan namin.
behold 20mins later, the rain stopped at nawala rin ang baha... sheesh!

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